In yoga the aim is to find balance between effort and ease, sthira sukha. I've always been high on the effort side, and not just in yoga, but in life!
Ive been known to "power through" things. I do remote work and teach yoga and care for my dog and take on challenges of doing 100 handstands a day and meditate daily and set goals for myself.... All at 110%. The list goes on. These things are all well and good, however with no ease to balance it out, I burn out easily. I get drained and can't figure out why. I wonder why all my efforts seem to make me so tired. It's all effort and no ease! When I'm 110% in effort, I'm 110% in unworthiness, in needing to do things to prove myself and who I am. I'm 110% about me and my concern for looking good.
So... How to find balance? How to balance out effort with ease? For me, it starts with awareness. Meditation helps. Observing my mind helps. When I feel that "go,go,go," that push to do it all, I stop, I pause, and I drop it all to do something just for me. I play piano and sing. I draw a bubble bath. I talk a long walk in the woods and leave my phone behind. I sit and read all afternoon. It's in these moments I find that inner pace in knowing I am no less worthy when I do these things... That in fact, I am worthy just as I am. ❤
I believe we all probably tell ourselves we are unworthy, and it breaks my heart because it is such a lie. Know you are worthy, you are loved, you are amazing, just as you are. And if you can't see it, see if you can balance sthira sukha. See if from a balanced place, your inner peace and love can shine light into the dark places.
Namaste, sweet friends.